Category Archives: Christmas Sex Toys

A Pegging Primer

Pegging Santa

Picture Credit Meghan Boehners

There’s no better way to get locked out of a party than by bringing up the subject of pegging. It was 2010 and I was sitting on a porch in St. Petersburg, Florida, with a bunch of friends from high school, when I drunkenly shouted, “I love pegging!” A heated conversation ensued, and ten minutes later, the host’s wife had locked the front door, and we had to beg to be let back in. I talk about a lot of things that other people are afraid to discuss, but nothing makes people more uncomfortable than discussing pegging. So consider this my PPSA, Pegging Public Service Announcement.

Pegging is a neologism coined by Dan Savage to describe when a woman dons a strap-on dildo and sodomizes her boyfriend. Nobody surveys how many people engage in this practice, so I can’t give you exact figures on how common it is. What I can tell you, though, is that judging from the private correspondence I get, pegging is on a lot of people’s minds, yet few people dare to discuss it publicly.

So, here’s a primer on pegging for women.

1. Pegging isn’t gay. Just because a man wants a dildo in his rectum, it doesn’t mean that he’s gay. In fact if he doesn’t want to be pegged, he’s probably gay, or at the very least, uncomfortable with his sexuality. A man who’s confident in his heterosexuality won’t be worried that enjoying being penetrated by a be-dildoed woman will make him spend his nights dreaming about Neal Patrick Harris. Gay men don’t want to be pegged by women.

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Why You Should Buy Your Family Sex Toys for Christmas

Don Wands Candy Cane Glass Pleasure Wand. Image from http://www.shevibe.com

If you’re planning on giving vibrators to your relatives as Christmas presents, you might think that you’re a daring individual who is bucking tradition and upending the spirit of such a sacred holiday. I should know: When I was sixteen, I gave my cousin a vibrator for Christmas. I felt like such a rebel because I made my family so uncomfortable. But gifting vibrators for Christmas is not a new phenomenon. In fact, you could even call it an American tradition. One hundred years ago, vibrator companies promoted their products as suitable holiday gifts for brothers to buy for their sisters. And they suggested that grandchildren should buy their grandfathers violet ray machines, electrical devices that emitted purple light and came with rectal and vaginal attachments. You can still buy violet rays today, but only at sex toy stores.

So purchase that We-Vibe II for your parents without shame. Improve their sex lives. If they say that a dual-purpose g-spot vibrator and clitoral stimulator designed to be worn during intercourse is an inappropriate gift for them, direct them to my website. Blame it on me. They may be secretly contemplating divorce, and this is the one product that could save their marriage. In fact, if you don’t buy this present for your parents they will surely divorce, and you’ll only have yourself to blame.

Is your sister cranky? It’s definitely because she is having too few orgasms. You must remedy this problem. It’s your job as a brother. Buy her the I Rub My Duckie Santa Vibe. It doubles as a Christmas ornament, and it looks like a children’s toy, so nobody will think you’re creepy for purchasing it for her.

Is your brother getting on your nerves? It’s most likely because he’s sick of masturbating with his hand. Buy him the Tenga 3D Masturbation Sleeve. Not only is it one of the most highly rated masturbation sleeves, but also it looks like it was designed by Frank Gehry, so he can set it on his shelf and claim that he bought it at MoMa.

If you don’t buy your family sex toys for Christmas, this will be the result:

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